Ahoy, Internetz!

Internetz: Hello, I guess. Do I know you?

petite marmotte:  Umh... no... not really.

Internetz: Yes, I didn't think so. Sigh... ok, I'm here already, so what do you need? 


petite marmotte:  I...


Internetz: No, wait, first things first, what's with the pirate slang? Are you a pirate? Are you boarding my ship or something?

petite marmotte: No, no, I'm not boarding anything.


Internetz: I thought so, I've never seen a pirate marmot. And I have seen some weird things, let me tell you.


petite marmotte: Well, technically... I'm not a marmot either.


Internetz: Well, this is just nonsense then. I feel like I'm wasting my time with you. I have important places to be, so please tell me what you wanted to tell me. 


petite marmotte: I... I'm sorry, I was... it was just a saying... I meant the people on the internet, I guess...


Internetz: Oh, the people. I see. You mean those procrastinating meatbags who spend their time adding poorly spelled captions to cat pictures?

petite marmotte: Yes! But that's not bad spelling, it's LOLspeak! It's supposed to be funny!

Internetz: Well, I do not find it amusing. And since we are on the subject, please remove that z from my name, it shouldn't be there.


petite marmotte: Oh, ok... there you go.


Internet: Thank you. I couldn't have done it without you. You are my hero. When I grow up, I want to be Just. Like. You.


petite marmotte: ...


Internet: So... opening a blog, are we? What a great idea! Revolutionary!


petite marmotte: Ok, enough with the sarcasm. I know blogs are a little... 2007.


Internet: Oh, then let me guess. You really enjoyed 2007 and decided to go back?

petite marmotte: No! As a matter of fact, I hated that year. It was the year that... wait, why am I telling you this? I just wanted a place where I could write about the places I visit, and whatever geek/nerd stuff I manage to find there. 


Internet: ...


petite marmotte: What? You don't think it's a good idea? 


Internet: ...


petite marmotte: For example... I found a guy in Mexico who sold these cool dragon statue-thingies. Maybe if someone else likes dragons and is going to Mexico...


Internet: You know what? I'm bored already. You go ahead and do that. Post your little articles and your reviews and whatever makes you happy. You can even add misspelled captions to your dragon pictures, for all I care. I have other things to do. Important things.


petite marmotte: Oh... ok. Where are you going?


Internet: I really need to look into this pirate marmot thing. It's got potential, don't you think?  And I might check your chat records from 2007... you don't mind, do you?


petite marmotte: Yes I do!


Internet: Oh well, tough luck. Have fun with your dragons, kid. See ya!